Never ever.

I'm one all for second chances. I like to think that people can change and mature, that you can make up with your old best friend when you had a blow-out fight, and that you can still wish your ex the best after things didn't work out between the two of you. I think that this stems from 2 places (at least for me): the model that Christ gives us as He repeatedly forgives us for our shortcomings and the desire to have it all. I'm not one that's good at cutting out something completely - I want to be able to eat my dark chocolate on occasion without eliminating it, drink my diet coke moderately (giving it up for lent one year was a struggle), and be able to spread my time among church/med school/etc. without really giving up anything all together. While I think in a lot of ways this mindset is great (God does call us to forgive others, giving 7th and 77th chances, as well as to walk the line of being in the world and not of the world), there are some things in our life that we don't get to play this little balancing act with. I think that there are some things in our lives to which God asks us to say "never ever."

Those of you who know me (or have read LR somewhat regularly) know that I have a tendency to relate things I'm learning spiritually to pop songs (spoiler alert: get ready for a couple of those this week). Taylor Swift (one of my favs!) has a new song that I just discovered that was the second inspiration for this post: take a listen here!

So Taylor Swift says "never ever" to her ex-boyfriend. What does God call us to say "never ever" to?

Formerly, when you did not know God, you were slaves to those who by nature are not gods. But now that you know God—or rather are known by God—how is it that you are turning back to those weak and miserable forces? Do you wish to be enslaved by them all over again? You are observing special days and months and seasons and years! I fear for you, that somehow I have wasted my efforts on you.

^{~ Galatians 4:8-11}

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. 

~ Galatians 5:1

 You were running a good race. Who cut in on you to keep you from obeying the truth? That kind of persuasion does not come from the one who calls you.“A little yeast works through the whole batch of dough.” I am confident in the Lord that you will take no other view. The one who is throwing you into confusion, whoever that may be, will have to pay the penalty. 

~ Galatians 5:7-10

You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love.  For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other. So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. 

~ Galatians 6:3-18

So this is WHOLE lot of good stuff. No way I can talk about all of it, but here are my highlights:

What were the Galatians like before they knew the Lord?
They were slaves to other things that weren't the Lord. This can be so many things for us - our careers, reputation, money, fame, other people, and any thing else we think at will fulfill us. In my mind, I sort of view this "pre-God" state as similar to Taylor's being in a bad relationship with her now-ex-boyfriend. Bear with me for this comparison, but I see a lot of similarities: the expectations for something to satisfy that won't, the emotional entanglement and slavery to something that won't satisfy. When it comes to the Lord, ANYTHING that we pick that is not God to worship and dedicate our lives to can become like Taylor's terrible ex - all consuming and unsatisfying. The truth of the matter is: the Lord is the only person big enough to fill that space in our lives. 

What were they like afterwards?
Free! Unburdened by slavery to things that don't satisfy! Walking in the spirit, and satisfied by the Spirit. Serving others humbly in love.  All wonderful, wonderful things! The hard part is believing that the things the Lord has called us to are better than the things we were enslaved to. 

What does God call them to say "never ever" to and why?
Turning back to "weak and miserable forces" to which they were previously enslaved. Stopping "obeying the truth." "Indulging in the flesh." Enough bible talk Betsy, what does that mean for me? I think it can mean a lot of things. For some people, it can mean turning back to habits that draw them further away from the Lord. For other people, it can mean placing other things in a higher priority than the Lord. It can mean rebelling and refusing to obey instructions set by the Lord for our benefit. It can mean indulging in sins while knowing they are wrong, and expecting the Lord to forgive us anyways. 

God asks us not to do this because it enslaves us all over again and prevents us from having true freedom in Him. God states that turning back to these things is something that does not come from the Lord. He also says that we cannot have both - we can't serve the Lord and gratify our own fleshly desires. We have to choose, and say never ever to something. 

As a side note, I will say that I know having to say never ever puts a bad taste in some people's mouths. It brings out the feeling that Christianity is a legalistic set of do's and don'ts that don't really make sense. To those people I will say a few things. I want to reiterate that God says never ever to things that enslave us and prevent Him from being number 1. This can be different things for different people, making it hard to come up with a hard and fast list of do's and don'ts. There are also certain things that have caused humans to struggle for a long time, and so there are examples of those common struggles in the bible that may make it onto a list of do's and don'ts for some people. The ultimate goal is to always have the Lord be first, and the point of a never ever, is that it acknowledges our own weaknesses and that there are certain things in our lives that repeatedly make it hard for God to be first. I definitely don't have all of the answers here, but I just want to emphasize that I'm advocating for acknowledging the seriousness of our own sin and placing the Lord first instead of for legalism. 

How are they supposed to do that?
"Walk by the Spirit." I think the big thing here is to remember that this does not come from us. We need the Lord's strength to make sure that He says first and foremost in our lives, and to make sure to not turn back to things we once did for comfort. God doesn't ask us to do it by ourselves. 

What happens when we don't say "never ever?" 
And here's the reality of the whole thing - as hard as we try to say "never ever" to these things, we will fail. In my life when I've failed at the "never ever," the Lord has used those times to demonstrate his inseparable love to me (Romans 8:31-38) as well as His infinite grace. He's humbled me immensely, and shown me how much I really need Him. He's drawn me back into a deeper, more intimate relationship with Him. How much easier is it to say "never ever," when we know we have a God that can completely cover us when our efforts fail?


So my challenge for us today is to think about the areas in our lives where maybe we're trying to have it all when really it's a "Spirit vs. Flesh" area. Are there sins and struggles you're turning back to that you need to view with a "never ever?"

Like, ever.